One case specifically noted the equality of each spouse in the reconciliation process –
“I can't observe any power control over our conflict so far. Both of us are aware of our faults as the conflict arises between us. Each of us always humbles to the other as I/he realize that this was my/his mistake.”While another case described the tension over how to satisfy his need for connection and peace with his wife and the challenges of the reconciliation process by noting that -
"Being angered, I spent my time on doing my work and did not talk to her and even did not come home to have lunch or dinner. I understood her nature was stubborn and it was not easy for her to come to reconcile with me until I came to her first. If I don't want the conflict to become bigger, I'm the one to compromise and reconcile with her."Significantly, one case noted the power of active listening and empathy in facilitating the reconciliation process -
“Even though I was angry with him, I still kept my character of being reasonable and reacted in a polite way. He couldn't deny humbling himself to listen to my own reason and my opinion.”Another case stressed the importance of dealing with issues early before conflict escalates.
“For us the relationship after the conflict is fine, as we never have any complicated problems and whenever we have problems we resolve them in a couple of days.”A fruitful exploration for peacebuilders could be to look deeply at their own family habits of reconciliation and discuss them together.
