2.2.3 Healthy Families and Conflict Management

There are many qualities used to define healthy families or support healthy family relationships. (n1) These qualities enable families to weather those inevitable conflicts that are a part of life in any relationship, and become even more crucial if a family is to survive a time of crisis.

Some qualities of healthy families include:

1. Commitment to each other as a family, and to the well-being of individual members.
2. Fairness among the spouses (equitable sharing, respect and support among spouses).
3. Parenting that nurtures, protects, and guides children.
4. Respect for individual differences and needs.
5. Trust, supported by predictability and stability in family interactions.
6. Flexibility in adapting to both internal and external demands of life.
7. Understanding and open communication between family members.
8. Effective problem-solving strategies, allowing for conflict resolution.
9. Shared life values.
10. Networking with larger social circles (relatives, friends, community, other social systems), thus providing resources for both physical and psycho-social support. (n2)

The same qualities that make up a healthy family also support and maintain them during conflict situations.

***Notes

1) Lists by researchers, while sometimes using distinct wordings and categories, include considerable overlap in identifying these qualities. See also the U.S. Health Department report (Krysan, Moore, Ph.D., and Zill, Ph.D., Child Trends, Inc; May 10, 1990) for summary lists from several different research reports. Available online at: http://aspe.hhs.gov/daltcp/Reports/ressucfa.htm

2) Adapted from Tip sheet: Ten Processes (Qualities) that Support Healthy Family Relationships by Gayle Peterson, (excerpted from Making Healthy Families, 1996-2003.). Available online at http://www.askdrgayle.com/seminar_j.htm